Author Archives: penaugural

Love

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love has no definition however its boundaries can be broken.
found everywhere for everyone but yet it is not always felt.
to have it, see it, feel it can cause
years of searching for love without gain.

when found

build for day to day moments of memories
encompassed with passion towards a continued connection
simply existing together rewards the sorrow of mistakes
find meaning in the truth love has no definition.
A poem explained:
I used to think romance was something out of a fairy tale. I never believed it was always the everyday gestures of sentiment that really show love. I may not have love but I am seeing more and more through talking with couples that have been together over 30 years how they stay together. It really ain’t a piece of cake and they will tell you that, but it is also a give and take but most important it is a commitment, a promise to sticking with each other. In other words who is going to be that person that takes the middle seat in an airplane.

-Jennie Nawrocki

Discovering Love

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Beautiful the possibilities
Bulging with promise
Beginning to partake in its bounties

Piece by piece explored
Picked for its explosions
Portrayed with eagerness playfully

Spinning in another direction
Spoiled from disappointment
Somebody say you’re sorry

Try again to gain
Turbulant vocal gushes
Toppling into turmoil

What’s left?
Words of loathing
Withdraw from the waste

Look within
Leaving to clear the window
Live only to love.

Action

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Continually reminiscing the black holes
brings nothing but emptiness
forever despondent of air
riding into the abyss

It commences with a fever
staking the only future
free of the nuances
openly for the world to believe

Turn the mind
reevaluate inter weavings
inside see a small particle
gone exponential

relating differently through reflection
mutual finality occurs
soon transparency emerges
shattering all perceived truths

working slowly to build
strong understandings of inner framework
even surprising yourself
knowing secrets of the subconscious

feelings morphed from within
supporting the foundation
durability is the key
strengthening the whole

Sustainability through versatility
for it was your choice
trusting where you belong
when nothing was guaranteed.

-Jennie Nawrocki

Unbelievable

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The heart she had destroyed
always told its you
not me
I’m at fault
I’m selfish
I did wrong
I was left
no one wanted to save me

I was pushed
I told myself
it is your own fault
I am unlucky
I am the problem
I am the only one who does bad
It is my pride, my ego
my judgement, my choice
that brought me down

I hear them say
you are a nobody
somebody who can’t
definitely shouldn’t
wear a craze lunatic sign
you freak
you have no heart to give
hospitalization, jail, die
is your only choice
we will make sure you love no more

good thing, I don’t listen either.

-Jennie Nawrocki

Lessons

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When a student does something that a teacher and/or administrator is required to follow through with consequences, during the process part of the conversation usually entails some version of this question, What did you learn? Often putting all the responsibility on the student rather than all parties involved. It is only when the problem is repeated or ballooned within either the school or real world environment when the whole scenario is looked at often resulting in the administrations fault because they didn’t put together the supports needed to stop the problem in the first place. Take for example the economic decline, at first it was the persons fault for not paying their bills or participating with insider trading, then people may look at what they did wrong and possibly stop however for various reasons the actions continue if not expand. Then it starts to be the companies fault not providing internal policies that would catch the behavior before it caused tremendous harm. However it is now the governments fault for not creating or enforcing laws especially when they affect the populus as a whole. Resulting to the fact that it is again the people’s fault because they voted in corrupt politicians. By now it is so widespread, so interweaved causing world wide panic of depression that nothing is clear as to whom is responsible. Now we are all trying to clean up a big mess, which many people theorize as to how to solve. Since everyone else has an opinion or has given their solution why not be in the masses and throw out mine.

I long ago wrote an essay on motivation (now lost in the tech abyss of deletions), in short that essay says motivation all boils down to that american constitutional right of the pursuit of happiness. It is that individuals happiness that determines whether gaining money is defined by greed or simply just survival. Think about it I can have the same mattress for years while another person feels if they don’t change it or have the money to change it once a year passes then they feel distraught, or otherwise unhappy.

In the schools a student may misbehave to gain others love and respect the only thing he always wanted from his peers or a girl wanting to escape the world of paper pencil lecturing because she is a person who would do better learning skills as an apprentice in a workshop for she is primarily happy when she can create, fix, build all skills that prepare her for blue collar jobs which hardly exist.

When we become adults our motivations for happiness become more complex because we have more responsibilities derived from our numerous connections. Some would call this the politics of Joe the plumber. He still has that primal instinct to fight or flight the everyday needs of survival, but yet again those may be different from Sally the regular office worker. Whether this ability to pursue happiness through basic survival needs is morally just has become the bigger debate.

Truly it is these internal motivational factors that determine all the lessons you will learn. Basically if you are not motivated internally external factors become irrelevant. A person will always further themselves if they think their survival or glimpse at happiness is paramount. A case in point a gang member would rather rot in prison than rat their own out because their fate would be worse if they broke the gangs/personal code of honor. That is why in any scenario a manipulation of the environment may aide but to inspire within always wins out.

-Jennie Nawrocki

Waiting

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We never met but a glance,
Always an eyegazing dance.
You saw me, I looked through you.
I saw you and you looked through me.
Without a moment alone,
Nothing ever got done.
Forever learning too,
Brings no need to plea.
For it will all come to past,
Us waiting so fast.

-Jennie Nawrocki

Generations

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Coming from varied cultures
Bright with possibility
An interaction of sounds
Bustling uncomfortable barriers
Joining conversational pauses
For moments of laughter
Continually repeating
Growing productive passageways
Respective of all lifespans

-Jennie Nawrocki

Invention

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I have spent so long writing and speaking for others, while living through their quotes, my originality has waned. It took a long time for me to be real and not live through colloquialisms. I have my own stories to tell, they are not meant to change your life, judge your actions or directives in your daily world. I tell them because they are the voice of my thoughts with a mixture of imagination, hopes, and reality. The full circle of it is that it is the only way I communicate safely, or is it. I found out that even when the internet is published regardless of the amount of followers, everyone has an opinion. The bell curve of thought begins and it is the outliers that are brazen and remembered, bad or good. Why can’t the curve close into a circle it does, only to connect with another, flowing infinitely eventually leveling at any point. To be shy and not write or write to others opinions is without internal emotional freedom. However to write without intention of compassion leaves no one satisfied. Conversation written or verbal is meant for connection, your level is dependent on your own reality of compassionate communication from within your self.

I don’t want to live in a world where I have to be told how to think, feel and believe, no one does. Manipulators who fish and/or change the situation for their individual benefit will tell you it is for the best, because they care, while the whole time only using you until they get what the need and dropping you the second you aren’t needed. They are the corporations that run this world, they are depleting our natural resources because they think they will always find a way to get what they need, when the only thing you can take to the grave with you is your conscience. To me conscious is being aware how you affect others and dealing with your own personal hang ups. Everybody brings their issues to the conversation it is how well you know yours and what you do to counteract it, if negative, that makes you an individual.

At times I feel what ever I say someone has said before but just my cover twist of their tune. True lasting invention is filling a unknown needed void. Invariably coming from the phrase “wouldn’t it be nice”. Although it is the person that puts action into that statement is the inventor rather that the idea maker and rightly so. I think I have to write just to get the other thoughts out of mine. I don’t think that is selfish, I think of it as stepping out of the ditch.

-Jennie Nawrocki

Dreams

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In slumber their vibrance
joins yesterday, today and tomorrow.
As awake, plans full of imaginations filled with
romance, wealth, prosperity, happiness
pipe dreams, they are all pipe dreams
only to shatter in the bitter cold.
In there somewhere a drop
without greed, selfishness, falsehoods
based on strength and true substance
changes the flow down the pipe
concentrating one drop at a time
warming the surrounding environment to
becoming comfy, cozy, content.
Soon the long hollow shaft smoothly guides
no longer frozen and jaded
willing to allow a more pure filtered sustenance.
These resulting dreams no longer
rot with bubbles of impossibility
but are refined out of reality
flexible enough to satisfy all.

-Jennie Nawrocki