Hearts are peculiar things, they manage of blood through the body involuntary, just as nerves send signals to the brain. Whether we want them to or not these things are necessary for survival. I guess that’s why so many expressions involve their meaning literal or metaphorical. I read quite a bit about them but none will out last that of follow your heart, to me it is the same as follow your gut feelings. For within us I believe we have the ability to see the importance of consideration and empathy towards others. That knowledge of how we effect others drives us. Sure we all make mistakes sometimes, but daily I see a human face or even imagine it and melt at their existence and need to remember we all have hearts we need to follow.
Dreams are funny things aren’t they. I once read that they allow a person to process what occurs during the waking hours. We have all heard of dreams of war, being naked before an audience, falling teeth, flying and so much more. Books I have seen on analyzing dreams can be extremely thick, for deeper interpretations or one liners as a quick reference. Whatever they may be dreams have always been a little emotional for me to say the least. I have had dreams nightmares really of wars where I am hiding from being continually chased or as everything crashes around me. I always wake up before I find out the ending. I think I wake up because they say if you really die in your dream you die in real life. I don’t know if it is true or not but it scares me more then anything else because my dreams are very vivid.
I wake up sometimes from these deep dreams and wonder where I am. Yes, even that has happened. When I was a little girl I would tell people about my dreams and they couldn’t believe how wild the were. What little girl would have a nightmare about Christmas presents chasing her, that scared her so much she woke in the middle of the night in a panic.
I have dreams where I am watching the whole situation and still get scared. There are dreams that made me have all sorts of feelings. One day I woke up from a dream watching a man dressed all in black with dark hair and he was holding a girl in the river near the base of a waterfall. Each time the little girl came out of the water she said “Daddy please can I?” All the while I am watching from the sky saying “kill child molesters”. Immediately, I woke up miserable and excited at the same time, really so many emotions occurred. Which made me think could this be a repressed childhood memory? I am sure some reading this are pretty positive they know it is. For they know everything I have ever done. Seriously, my family is like every other family and feels disgusted by child molesters.
I know how this dream transcended in my mind. I remembered a conversation where I heard someone saying that disliking child molesters is something everyone can agree on. Also I heard of someone talking about how it took several people to stick knives in people because they needed to be brought down. Now in my mind I must have mixed them together with some other stuff obviously like where did the waterfall come in?
Now all my dreams aren’t nightmares. I know I have good dreams to, I think those happen on nights I sleep the entire night or don’t remember or maybe I just didn’t dream that night at all. I can also dream in short increments during the day. I guess those are called day dreams, well they are to me maybe not others. I really can’t control what I dream about most people don’t. Though the unbelievable realness of my dreams will remain intriguing to figure out how much of my day is processed to support my psychological emotional well being through my dreams.
She fell into a trance that was unexplainable. The walkers by wondered if she was even awake for her eyelids were semi closed. Though the tile that she saw, brick really was rough on the edges as though someone had been digging their heels repeatedly, tapping down the crisp lines of rectangular precision. She could tell this happen over time for even sections of the mortar were even missing. It memorized her in everyway thinking of all the foot steps and the lives it supported as people walk casually on its surface. It was also a welcome distraction from the waiting she was enduring. Soon she would get a call, the call, that would determine her life forever. She was thinking of changing careers and this would be it, her acceptance into a world she dreamed about, but for some reason all she could do was look at this brick in the path before her.
It has been a year of mixed emotions slowly going down hill and this blog has reflected that downturn. The energy and thoughtfulness, just everything that goes into writing has been absent. So now with the time in between posts I should be able to post something that incorporates more than what is the first thing I blurt that comes to mind. One must not just be verbose but also live by the meanings of what they wrote. Now I am sure I will have opposing views, though I, like anyone else, always has a need for expression and this is mine.
As a result it is time for a refresher course, my name is Jennie Nawrocki and I am here as your entertainment if only for mere moments. Mind games aside, my writing is about going somewhere to achieve what has never been done, solving conflict between countries and families. There has to be a way to solve problems respectively. If you want to be a member of that continue reading. For here, I strive to achieve and in any other social media format or personal interactions I may have. Read on my friends read well.
It may be a day,
It may be a week
Or anything in between
But read on Sunday’s
To get the new
A story or thoughts indeed
There is a story I heard about a parent teaching there child after they had made a mistake of telling a lie to cover up something done wrong. So the parent had the child go out to the fence and gave them a bunch of nails and told the child to hammer all the nails into the fence. When the child was done the parent had the child take out all the nails. After it was finished there was barely a fence the child thought. The child asked why did you have me do that? The parent said, ” Once someone makes the same mistake over and over again or continues to lie and the person finds out there is always something to remind them.” The child looked at the fence it was basically gone. The child started to realize how serious his mistake was. The parent continued to say, ” It is more important not to lie, betray, or make mistakes otherwise the relationship accumulates bad memories and there is no more fence or defense of why that relationship is valuable or necessary, in other words no defense of keeping that relationship together and strong.”
Even I know I have made mistakes and apologize for them all the time. I realize that some of my relationships have weakened because of it. However, I have worked at remembering the things that I need to put into relationships to build them closer and strengthen a few others. In this new year when forgiveness is important there may not be many fences to mend or if there are starting now, I shall.
Happy New Year from one like me who is making new habits to live by.